And I'm telling you

Music is life and life is music.

Nothing, nothing makes me as delightfully emotional as music does. It feeds my soul or it poisons my mind, doesn't matter, it makes me feel alive like nothing else ever could.

I used to have a decent voice, a decent range, terrible sense of rhythm and eagerness to learn more, to be able to preform, to be able to pour myself into the notes and die on a stage only to be alive because of it. Yes, dreaming big is important, and yes, with enough time & money it could be done, I could be another average singer with something meaningful to say. It's just that I realized that it's not my part anymore, maybe it never truly was. My part is, in a way, so much important than that.

A few years ago a dear friend of mine said after a gig where every single thing went wrong that he was okay because every time he started to, you know, be not okay, he just looked at me, saw the joy and unconditional love on my face and knew that nothing matters, and everything is going to be just fine as long as I'm there. Now I don't even have to be there, he just thinks of me for a split second, and it's the same effect. I'm his anchor.

It happened again with bands, other musicians and I realized that that's what I am - a reason to play just one more gig, to put up with just one more fight, to take just the next small step. Because I believe in them like children believe their fathers to be superheroes, and even if it's not true, even if they are bound to let me down, they try as hell not to.

So that's what I am, an anchor. I don't have to be me, I don't even have to be there, but that's what I'll always be anyway.

Thank you, all of you lovely people for letting me be a small part of the wonders that you create, and thank you for appreciating it.

And thank You, for reminding me what I love most.